Left knee operation postponed till 2020

right knee MRI
  • responsibility for the upcoming weddings

  • conversation with dr ben tan

  • FFK overhead cost

  • weighting the loss of opportunities and the gain of knee recovery

  • taking beautiful risk

  • as long as i am waking at 7am

  • photo of me with lovage

It came in quite hard on me when I found out about my lost of my right knee ACL and meniscus tear.
Back then, I came across @lovage IG that she is going for the knee op and was so for it to go for the operation. Took a hard look at my accounts, both wedding couples dates and financial accounts.
Tough.
I was suffocating one night in the office,
so stressed up that I turned up at a friend’s place.

Thank God for a few wealthy couples/friends.
This particular friend happens to go through both the super good and super bad
time in their family business.

It wasn’t a talk about my knee operation,
it was for a discussion of which, if FFK is being bought over.

That CNY period was pretty crazy thou.

I wish I had someone like me to stand in for me. I wish this was like 5 years ago, when my craft is replicable. I wish I grew my brand in a way that its transactional and sure, lets go for the operation.

My response to Dr Ben tan when he ask me to give priorities and seek replacement for my work.
He is my go to guy when its comes to knee,
but when it comes to my work,
I go with my gut. That which make beautiful mistakes without regrets.

So, I gave the operation a miss.
A half mil investment a miss.
A shot on this wretched man that I am.

ffk basketball

My heartaches everytime I think about
how I couldn’t play basketball for a while.

For the past 1 year -ish,
I’ve been running FreshfromKenneth on a monthly overhead cost of 10K+/-
Last year was great, but almost everything I earn,
I put it back to the biz.

My knee injury made me realised that I need to take care of myself financially and
physically. Eventually, all of it, still comes back to me.
If its gotta be, it gotta be me.

The beautiful risk I took got me a few good path I’ve found.
I stop asking, why me.
I started asking a better framed question,
how can I make this better.

So with the current physical state I am,
as long as I can walk, breathe and problem solve,
sure, let me wake up at 7am and
place myself at where I am called to,
cultivate what I am good at in this short timeframe that I have.

Especially for me, I don’t have a lot of time to
think about stuff. When people pays us for our craft,
I don’t feel how I feel about myself that day.
I perform what I do best at. To excel even at my worst,
even when I throws up behind the scene because of a bad migraine,
stomach flu or a breakup with my ex.

Actually, it took me a art performance to get my shit together:
https://www.freshfromkenneth.com/cpj/11-dawn-ng

That I have to give glory to God for the Holy Spirit.
Often I might say, ‘thats what I usually would have done,’
but I know that He is my advocate who constantly bring to my remembrance of
the things I need to know and at the sound of the music I choose,
I see how it should be edited and the shots I have shot.

This ‘Garden’ I’ve been placed in,
I hope to take care of it as much as He allows.
Bad or good decision if I have gave the knee operation a miss?
Lets put it as, what I have decided on,
things will be in place in His time.

f40b6adf-7fda-42f4-bf21-0459fabd38dd.jpeg

So God,
Help me please.


FYI. Fan boy moment when I got my hand illustrated by @lovage

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